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20130126
20130203
Search Results 0 to 4 of about 5 (some duplicates have been removed)
the constitutionality of "the defense of marriage act" or doma, which defines marriage as between one man and one woman. the act was signed into law in 1996 by bill clinton-- a man who understands being defensive about your marriage. [ laughter ] now, barack obama's justice department decided not to defend doma, but don't worry, your tax dollars are still being spent on the case. house republicans hired super-straight, super-lawyer paul clement to defend marriage to the tune of $2 million dollars. [ laughter ] now, the case won't be heard until march, but that money is already buying brilliant legal arguments from clement like: "marriage should be limited to unions of a man and a woman because they alone can produce unplanned and unintended offspring." [ laughter ] damn straight. yes! yes, marriage is for straight people, who can go to a wedding, get tanked on chablis, and make a baby, barebacking it in a coat closet. [ laughter ] as -- [cheers and applause] fans of the coat closet. that's how god intended it. [ laughter ] planning to have kids just isn't right. [ laughter ] but perhaps the strongest
impressions, and we accidentally put the same guy in it multiple times. but in our defense, to a round eye, you do look similar. as a honky, i can say round eye, i think. we might pause and edit that out. i leave you with a lovely mashup of white girls doing bill cosby impressions. >> i'm bill cosby. >> the pudding. what you got to do with if you put the pudding in the spoon in your mouth and twirl it out and spit it rudy. and camille. i'm bill cosby. [laughi [laughing]. >> she has got a gift. thank you. we'll see you next 0 captioning sponsored by comedy central ["the colbert report" theme music playing] [eagle caw] [cheers and applause] [crowd chanting stephen] >> stephen: that's right. thank you, ladies and gentlemen. thank you so much, everybody. [cheers and applause] folks, please -- welcome -- welcome, ladies and gentlemen, in here out there to tonight's information uplink. thank you for joining us, folks. folks, when i'm right, i'm right. and when i'm wrong, i'm often right, too. but when i'm wrong and i'm wrong, i'm big enough to change my opinion. [ laughter ] case in point, i'm
Search Results 0 to 4 of about 5 (some duplicates have been removed)